Memorials are moments and items we use for remembering our loved ones who have passed from this earth yet continue to touch our lives. Contrary to what many believe, this type of remembrance doesn’t just happen once a year. While it gets easier with time, you still feel the physical absence of a loved one more deeply on momentous occasions, like your wedding day. As such, a great way to shift the sadness to warm remembrance on such a day is to work a special moment of observance into the day’s events.
Candle Lighting
Light is a powerful reminder that dark times do not last forever. The Olympic Torch, the infamous light at the end of the tunnel, candle-light vigils–all of these symbols work to keep our hope, faith, and love alive. Therefore, using the symbolic light can be the perfect way to remember a loved one. Light a candle during the ceremony; incorporate a moment of silence as you light it in respect to departed. If your venue has special regulations against fires, use a lantern or one of those battery-operated tealights. The flame doesn’t have to be real in order for the remembrance to be true.
Photos in Remembrance
Using photos to remember your loved ones is an excellent way to keep the mood light while showing your guests just who miss so much. You can create a special remembrance table and place all of the photos there. You can bring your surviving family members into the moment by having each of them place a complimentary flower on the table, either during a scripted portion of the event or throughout the day. Depending on the number of tables you have, you could use photos (marriage photos would be best) as centerpieces for the event. It’s a great way to show the continuity of love while giving a place of honor to those who came before.
Seat of Honor
A “Seat of Honor” at your wedding ceremony is a very direct way of letting everyone know that while this loved one is no longer with us physically, they are still present in spirit. The honorary chair may be decorated with flowers or any other appropriate item and is placed near the altar. Either the couple or the officiant can explain the meaning of the chairs during the ceremony.
Wedding Program Acknowledgment
If you don’t want an added physical or ceremonial element to remember your loved ones, then a simple acknowledgement in your wedding program should be the perfect solution. Simply insert a page of names you wish your guests to know, or have a running script of names boarder your program. Both options give you the opportunity to acknowledge your loved ones seamlessly and practically.
Play a Special Song
Mine is a family of music lovers. If a beloved song comes on the radio, chances are we know where we were, what we were doing, and who we were with when we first heard it. If your family is anything like mine, then a special song is probably the perfect way to bring your absent loved ones into the celebration. Whether poignant or vibrant, wistful or fun, choose a song that reflects how you remember those who are no longer here. If you wish to make them the center of the moment, incorporate a slide show to play with the song. If you want to make it a celebratory moment, ask your family to join you on the floor to dance in your loved one’s honor.
There are many ways to honor your loved ones on your special day. Just remember, if it is a true reflection of who they were to you, then it is probably the best way to remember them on the big day. And if you have some great ways to remember those you love, we’d love to hear them!
Happy Memorial Day to you and yours!
